“Tell me and I forget, teach me and I may remember, involve me and I learn.”
This quote is by Benjamin Franklin, an American writer, scientist, inventor, statesman, diplomat, printer, and publisher who lived from 1706 to 1790.
I came across Franklin’s quote when I was reading about raising and nurturing children. Although part of parenting needs to include telling children things and teaching them, I agree with Franklin that spending time and doing activities together is where much lasting and quality learning takes place. Talking with children, listening to them as they share their thoughts and ideas, doing activities together, and when possible being open to them choosing the activity are all impactful. They show children that we value being with them and that they are loved. Being valued and loved are vital both for children and for adults too.
There are many ways to involve children. I have friends who take their grandchildren on outings, such as going to the zoo, attending children’s theater plays, or spending time at the park and having a picnic. I know parents who include their children in preparing meals, doing household tasks, and gardening, doing these activities together in a fun way. Putting together puzzles, drawing, and playing catch in the backyard are more of the many ways to enjoy interacting with children. And of course reading to young children, and reading with older children, is a special form of togetherness and also has the benefit of making it more likely children will continue to have an interest in reading when they are adults.
As I write this, I know there are parents who are busy and who don’t have the amount of time they would like to have with their children. This is especially true for those who must have more than one job in order to have sufficient income for basic needs and for those who have other essential commitments that are time-consuming. That’s where it’s important to do our best to make the time we do have with children quality time, and quality time by definition refers to interaction and involvement.
Some parents are in the habit of letting their children watch TV or look at cell phones or other electronic devices so that the parents can do other things. Research has shown that it’s harmful for children to have a lot of screen time and that it’s essential for their well-being to limit it. This applies to adults as well, especially when their own habit of looking at their cell phone or TV takes away from spending time with their children.
Benjamin Franklin is known for having been a man of intelligence and innovative ideas, and for being knowledgeable about numerous subjects, as shown by the many types of work he did. His words that I’ve quoted show he was also a man of wisdom. All of us would do well to benefit from his wisdom by keeping his words in mind. Doing so will enrich our children’s lives as well as our own.