“Ordinary happiness depends on happenstance. Joy is that extraordinary happiness that is independent of what happens to us. Good luck can make us happy, but it cannot give us lasting joy. The root of joy is gratefulness.” These words were written by Brother David Steindl-Rast, a Benedictine monk, psychologist, and author. When I read them, I immediately related to what Brother David is expressing.
Many things can make us feel happy. Spending time with people we care about, doing work we enjoy, having something positive happen that we hadn’t anticipated, and volunteering for a cause we care about are a few of the many activities or experiences that can add to our feelings of happiness.
Brother David’s words “The root of joy is gratefulness” especially resonate with me. It is important to remind ourselves often of all that we have been given and for which we should be thankful. It only takes reading a headline or two to realize how blessed we are. We are thankful for the times when we are content and have a sense of well-being. But we also need to be thankful for the more difficult and challenging times, because those experiences and how we approach them help us to grow as individuals, to become more empathic, courageous, and caring. In fact, I have found that reminding myself that there is a reason I am being faced with a challenge—even if that reason isn’t clear at the time—helps me to take the steps to deal with the challenge.
By being genuinely grateful, we open our hearts to joy, “that extraordinary happiness” of which Brother David writes. We cannot make joy happen—it is pure gift. Being thankful for our blessings and not taking them for granted help to prepare us to receive the gift of joy.