I visited my elderly mother at her assisted living apartment after work today, something I usually do several times a week. She has late-onset Alzheimer’s disease. Thankfully, it didn’t start until she was 96 years old. I’m also thankful that she knows who I am and always gives me a big smile when I arrive. I have friends whose parents had Alzheimer’s disease and who no longer recognized them. As much as we all need to accept such changes, it can be distressing when that happens.
A pattern my mother has is to tell me how much she likes the outfit I’m wearing and that it is pretty. It’s often one of the first things she says, and she usually says it at least six times during our hour-long visit. She compliments clothing she has seen many times but she doesn’t remember having seen before. I respond each time, thanking her for the compliment or telling her I like it too.
I feel gratitude both for her and for me that she seems basically content despite having memory issues. She always thanks me for helping her and for visiting her. And I thank her for all she did for me throughout the years, including taking care of me when I was a child, cooking delicious meals, and encouraging me to go to college even though our family was not well off financially.
Visiting my mother and seeing the other people who live on the floor where she lives remind me both to count my blessings for all the abilities I have and to try to live each day well, because they certainly pass by quickly.